Use the Strengths You Have

I have identified a list of Positive Parenting Strengths (you could call them Values in Parenting - VIP's) that are explicitly helpful in family life. We have many of the Positive Parenting Strengths in abundance but don’t always recognize them as valuable. When parents recognize these attributes and mindfully expand their use in situations, we feel more assured in our parenting. Increasing our reliance on these strengths also tends to give us more confidence in our communities and in work lives, as we see them help in all relationships.
The VIPs list is meant as an adjunct to the Values In Action list created by Chris Peterson, the positive psychology researcher, so I have not replicated the many valuable parenting skills, such as authenticity, curiosity, love of learning in the original. The lists can be used together to focus and enhance parents’ efforts.
Here,are the first two. These are skills that help parents of any aged child improve communication, feel more calm and confident, and maintain loving connections. Read through them and see how you may use them in sticky situations in your family.

1) Staying Grounded
You are able to stop, breathe, and connect in with the lower half of your body, especially when you find yourself getting worked up. You settle, turn inward, and feel the energy moving in your abdomen, pelvis, thighs, knees, calves, ankles, and feet. You feel your energy joining with the energy of the earth, so that you feel connected, rather than like a helium balloon that someone forgot to knot after blowing up. You stay internally present in difficult and emotional situations.

2) Centered
You have a strong sense of your true self, and you feel it as a place in which you reside in yourself. You have a clear experience of the distinction between your personality and your Being. You are good at gathering yourself, not being distracted, or pulled into self-judgment. When the going gets tough, rather than reacting by scattering or closing down, you make a point of staying open and self-aware. You know that being centered connects you to spirit and to well-being.

Happy Summer!